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23 May 2016 @ 04:41 am
I'm just gonna add to this post cause otherwise I'm, like, posting everyday and that's way too much lol.

All I want out of Houdini and Doyle is Harry being precious to Arthur Conan's children while Arthur Conan watches fondly. Damn, that was the good stuff. Also, Arthur Conan calling Houdini 'Harry'. And commenting on his pain. Arthur Conan still needs to be 100% more into the supernatural, but I guess Harry having a side/former newspaper boyfriend helped distract from that. Also Harry leaving Arthur Conan to take the rap for breaking into the lady constable's home (whose name I really should know).

I can't believe that POI had Finch and Reese both go to the same wedding undercover, but not undercover together as a couple. POI, why must you squander these prime opportunities? Also, Fusco.

Pancho Villa is up on youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y62G9C1mDsk so if anyone wants to see the most amazing bit of comedic acting from Clint Walker just go to 52:55 and watch until 55:16. (Telly Savalas (Pancho Villa) is trying to patch things up between Clint Walker's character and his wife so he tries to get them to remember how they first met, the scene cuts away at 55:16 for a little bit and then comes back to the dinner but really after that it's mostly about Pancho thinking he's having a heart attack when actually there's just a lizard in his underwear...)

I watched two Cheyenne episodes (that were released together as a whole movie in Finland and West Germany in 1964 called "Gold, Glory and Custer") where Cheyenne was the only white guy to witness Custer's last stand and live to tell about it and they dressed him up and made him pretend to be a cheyenne (which was kinda sketch cause it involved a full headdress and the whole outfit and darkening his skin, but for plot purposes rather than what they were doing to the actors that were probably italian which was just good ol' hollywood racism, so) and he was rivals with this fancy soldier guy fighting for this girl (who I think Cheyenne only pretended to be interested in to piss this other guy off tbh) but while Cheyenne and the girl were canoodling in the moonlight she was like 'oh darling, stake some land and get some gold.' and Cheyenne was like 'I can't because this land belongs to the indians.' and she's like 'but with gold we could get married and move away from here.' and Cheyenne started to get the ~kissing you was kinda okay but put on the brakes lady cause I don't know about all that~ look and was like 'you'd want me to go against my principals?' and she's like 'I thought you loved me.' and Cheyenne got this ~no way I love you that much~ look and got all huffy at her like 'I don't think you love me enough.' and then she and the fancy soldier guy tried to make friends with Cheyenne at the end (cause Cheyenne had been labeled a deserter by the fancy soldier guy but came back to defend him against court marshal anyway cause he's decent like that) and Cheyenne was basically like 'screw the both of you, you're both awful and I won't be around to protect anyone next time' and rode off to his next adventure. This also supposedly took place over two years and Cheyenne was I guess hiding out for being a deserter most of that time (so I can't make heads or tails of the show's timeline, it's all over the place, and perhaps Cheyenne is timeless).

But I like that Cheyenne's always being accused of things he didn't do. Like deserting the army or killing someone. That would also be an excellent way for Cheyenne to meet a cute ranch owner. Like maybe he's been on the run from a posse that's out to hang him for something he didn't do and it's been, like, weeks and he's half starved and he's, like, broke his leg or got shot or something and takes refuge in a barn that he thought was abandoned, but the owner's just fallen on hard times and can't keep up with all the repairs that have to happen. So Cheyenne's huddled up in a corner of the barn probably and this guy comes in, like doing his normal checking out the barn routine, and stumbles onto Cheyenne and Cheyenne's like wild animal, all skittish and vicious because he's wounded and has had everyone turn on him and hasn't been able to sleep at all, and the guy has to talk gently to him and try to establish a bond or whatever, but then the posse shows up and Cheyenne thinks that this is it, he's done for, this guy's gonna know the posse's for him and turn him over... but the guy goes out and meets the posse and is like 'nope, haven't seen anyone who looks like that around here, nobody's ever around here.' and the posse leaves and the guy goes back to Cheyenne, who's entirely confused by kindness now and is like 'just so you know, I didn't do the thing that they said I did.', and the guy's all 'wouldn't have mattered even if you did.' and then maybe he kneels down close to Cheyenne and tells him that 'mob justice isn't real justice.' or something and then perhaps reaches out towards Cheyenne, who probably only flinches a little, and feels his forehead and frowns at Cheyenne with real genuine worry in his eyes and asks if Cheyenne thinks he can make it to the house with some help and Cheyenne probably can't even look at this guy but nods and says that he think he can.
22 May 2016 @ 01:32 pm
I had a dream that because westerns were going out of style they tried to revitalize Cheyenne for another season by making it not a western. So it was in color and set at a college (where Cheyenne was a... student? ra? security guard? idk. it was one of those 'this guy is in his mid 30's and hanging around with college kids but we're pretending that's not weird because he dresses just like them' thing) and he wore things like board shorts and slip on sneakers and spent all the time lounging around letting girls run their fingers through his hair and every so often the dean would show up like 'Cheyenne, there's trouble.' and Cheyenne would be like 'aww man' and have to do things but I think it was set at a western college because Cheyenne had to round up posses of college kids (like he told one girl that she could be on gila monster watch) and they also gave him a bestie that he could have homoerotic tension with (like he went to go find this guy and the shot my mental direction picked to intro this guy was Cheyenne walking up behind him, but it's just Cheyenne's foot and the guy's sitting on the grass and he reaches back (because he thinks there's a girl behind him) and runs his hand up Cheyenne's leg until he gets to the bottom of Cheyenne's shorts and then looks up and is like 'oh hey Cheyenne').
22 May 2016 @ 03:56 am
I stumbled across a 70's movie with Clint Walker in it called Pancho Villa. It was kind of wild in that weird late 60's-early 70's way where some choices just don't really make sense and I think it was also kinda racist even though it was supposed to partially be telling the true story of Panco Villa, who was played by Telly Savalas, but it was also meant to be a sort of comedy so...
Anyway Clint Walker was adorable and kinda funny and had some sideburn action going on and also the guy who played The Rifleman was in it as an overly gung-ho colonel (like if you've ever seen the rifleman it was like the intense!eyes Lucas sometimes gets but dialed up 11 notches).

In other news, I can't believe Breckin Meyer was in New York two weeks after I was in New York and not while I was in New York. It's like he doesn't even want me to casually run into him.
17 May 2016 @ 04:02 pm
I can't believe they allowed Arthur Conan's wife to become well for a bit (she is back in her coma now, yes? I had to put pork in the freezer and when I came back ACD was hanging her dresses back up, but sadly, so I assumed) just so he would be more concerned with her and not about whatever was gravely effecting Houdini. But Harry's mom is precious. And the show would be much better if it turned out that the constable lady really did prefer other ladies.

Cheyenne found a white boy (who was old enough to steal a mexican girl for a wife, so not really a boy boy, and they loved each other so it was fine) who had been raised by the apache and tried to integrate him back into white society and all we for sure learned about young!Cheyenne was that he had long hair when he was with the cheyenne... the kid didn't want a white man's haircut and Cheyenne's like 'look, I get it, I had long hair too once, but white society...' and then he didn't elaborate about him being traumatized to cut it or anything, but everything he told the kid to do was like 'you have to because white society' (like sleeping inside and western concepts of politeness and marriage) and it was never 'this is what we do' it was always 'this is what white people do (and you're technically actually white so you have to do it to). I know it's weird and it makes no sense but you have to deal with it because you're a white person.' ...which makes me think that maybe young!Cheyenne had a hard time, and that maybe current!Cheyenne also has a hard time, dealing with white people (I mean, he obviously does, but also in like a 'everything white people do is weird and complicated and I'd like to just not but I can't because I am white' kind of way). In the end the kid eventually really liked being white because the law got his father's ranch back and because his wife was pregnant the law didn't deport her because america would never deport a future citizen (which, wild the 1950's version of the 1870's version of the 2010's anchor baby politics right there)... but overall the episode was fairly racist, I mean, part of it was supposed to be to illustrate being perceived native vs white, but the other part was pretty much done in a way that seemed like they thought they were trying to not disparage native people, but actually were.

Cheyenne also completely fucked up a guy's life (I mean, he was kind of a dick who rustled his own cattle and wouldn't let his wheelchair bound daughter get married or leave the house, so). By the end of the episode the guy had been found out to be a rustler, had a posse going after his step son, had his daughter leaving to go live with a guy he hated, and had his house burn down, and he's there, standing in the smoldering wreckage of his life, and Cheyenne standing there's like 'well, my work here is done.' and just trots off into the sunset. Classic Cheyenne.
14 May 2016 @ 02:10 am
I wish a guy would take care of Cheyenne. I mean, like, after he gets hurt or whatever.
It almost sort of happened in the second season when Cheyenne lands himself under a bear trap (like, a huge propped up log that falls and, presumably, kills the bear it lands on). Cheyenne had gone after this guy (who they tried to paint as almost a kid, but I swear the actor was at least in his mid 20's, so barely younger than Clint Walker was at the time) because he was in cahoots with some bandits and while they ride back to town together Cheyenne totally falls for this kid (like finds out that the kid's not all that bad, and had a sort of reason to fall into cahoots). And then this kid saves Cheyenne from the bear trap, and makes him a sling for his wounded arm, and Cheyenne was all 'you should have left me there and gotten away.' and the kid's basically like 'well, I'm not a complete asshole?'. And they're still riding into town, and Cheyenne's wound is becoming lock jaw, and then kid's all concerned, like 'we should stop.' and Cheyenne's all (barely able to stay on his horse) 'I have to turn you in.' and the kid's like 'yeah, I know, but we could go to my house for right now, and I'll get you a doctor, because we're kind of become buddies.' and Cheyenne agrees, and I was so ready for this kid to gently nurse Cheyenne back to health, and the kid instead dumps Cheyenne on his sister (who had some fiercely drawn on eyebrows for the old west). So close.

But I think Cheyenne would have really liked having a guy take care of him (rather than looking like he's just sort of dealing with being taken care of by ladies). Like, he wants someone to care for him and about him, but he's not good at that? He won't let anyone into his emotions (except for when he does and then those people always disappoint him).

Besides Cheyenne stuff, I think we're getting Doyle and Houdini now? Saw second episode. They're, like, consultants to the police with a lady constable? (would ACD really be okay with a fictitious version of himself being basically Sherlock Holmes?) And, despite the fact that the tv announcer said that they had a bromance, Harry didn't even know that Arthur Conan had a tb induced coma!wife? I mean, if they're going to have a bromance then they really need to be living, and raising Arthur Conan's children, together. Anyway they solved the case of the reincarnated boy, who was really just this guy's son, but they never really answered how the kid found out that he was adopted and who his birth parents were in the first place? like it's the 1880's or whatever, why would a child know this?
And next episode Harry passes out apparently. (just by looking at him you can tell he has a fragile constitution and also probably isn't used to the damp London weather... but I'm sure neither of these things will play a part in what happens to him)
09 May 2016 @ 05:05 am
Cheyenne was being fought over by three ranch owners because he's so amazing and they all wanted him as top hand (like, a ranch manager) but Cheyenne didn't like how one rancher was pushing out the other ranchers in this valley, so he quit and was going to leave town, because he can't stay in one place for too long, and the other two ranchers (a lady and a guy who wanted to marry the lady) were trying to get him to stay, offering him loads of money, and this just peeved Cheyenne more because he doesn't want to be owned or controlled by anyone, and the lady rancher was like 'won't you change your mind?' and Cheyenne was like 'I think I did...' and she smiles and he continues with 'instead of leaving tomorrow I'm leaving tonight', cause he's super dramatic. But the ranch hands from the guy's ranch ambushed Cheyenne while he was leaving town and tied him to his horse and sent the horse running, which nearly killed him. He was saved by the lady rancher, and was super pissed at the guy rancher until he found out that the guy wanted to marry the lady, and then Cheyenne was all 'why don't you marry him? he loves you.' and she's like 'he loves my ranch' and Cheyenne's thing was mostly about how ladies should be married instead of running ranches and dressing like guys, but it also sounded like Cheyenne was thinking about how he'd feel if some decent looking ranch owner wanted to marry him because he loved him so much, like how great of a deal that would be, being loved for who you are instead of what you can do for the other person. Cheyenne is so tragic.

Anyway, I was thinking that Cheyenne's definitely had sex with guys. I mean, that's kind of what you did out on the range. So his reluctance with Bat wouldn't be because he was inexperienced, like maybe Bat would think that, and Cheyenne would smile softly and be like 'Well, sure, I've had sex with guys. Out on the trail it, well, it tends to happen.' maybe he'd huff out a little laugh, like he wasn't really sure if Bat had ever done anything like that when he was out on the trail, but Bat, like, entirely has, of course, Bat has done everything, even if he does prefer his dalliances to be indoors, on a nice soft bed.

Since I'm so into westerns right now I'm also thinking about F&B western AUs. Like I think we had one, where maybe everyone was part of a saloon? Did we? But maybe we should have one where Stanton's the eccentric rich land owner who owns practically the whole town and has all the cattle and Damien manages Stanton's cattle records or money or something. And where Peter and Jared are, like, outlaws with hearts of gold? Does Hanna work for Stanton or is she, like, town sheriff who "works" for Stanton... and are Ellen and Anita her deputies? Or ranch ladies? Or would Ellen be a marshal who got sent really far out west because her life is terrible and now she has to work with Anita who thinks the west and the job are just the best ever? Does Pindar own a saloon and complain that everything out west is too dusty? Is Carmen a former cattle rustler or is she, like, a blacksmith or something?
Any way, at some point Peter and Jared ask Damien if he even knows how to ride a horse and Damien acts like that's a ridiculous thing to ask, but he's never actually ever on a horse, so...
08 May 2016 @ 04:27 am
What is The Night Manager even about? Because I thought it was about, you know, like Hiddleston maybe getting a job as a night manager at, like, a convenience store or whatever, with senior night manager Laurie showing him the ropes, and them having to do serious night manager things, but... it's not? I mean I tuned in for like 15 mins and it was all daylight and anger?
05 May 2016 @ 05:01 am
Went on some deliveries. Drove to NYC, then Myrtle Beach SC, and then Ashville NC... round trip it was nearly 3000 miles in three days. Phew. Also went through DC, which is so different than it was when I last went, like, 18 years ago. So many buildings now. And you, like, can't drive past the White House on a road anymore? Wild. The fbi building with it's one way street managed to fuck me over again though, so I guess the fbi stays the same.

I ordered checks. Because I still write actual checks. And like all of them have the date line with a 20 on it (like date:______20____). And I didn't want that, so I found one of the few that didn't. And then I get the checks and they have a fucking 20 on the date line. And it's such a redic thing to be upset about, I know, but I emailed the company about it anyway, because their product picture is wrong, and that's what I told them. I mean, they're perfectly serviceable checks, I just didn't want to re do how I do the date.
They emailed back to thank me for letting them know about the picture and that they'd send it along to marketing. Which, I mean, I guess, whatever.

I voted and then saw a bald eagle so it was all very ~american~. Also, Bernie won my state and now I'm even more disappointed that he won't be the dem nom. Ugh.

I finally watched Jurassic World in it's entirety. That assistants death was weirdly gratuitous? Like more so than any other death? I can't believe those kids saw Owen almost eaten by a dimorphodon and Claire being kind of badass and then decided that they wanted to stay with Owen instead. And I can't believe Chris Pratt couldn't have at least looked a little sad when bad things happened to the raptors. And I can't believe that B.D. Wong still had such a small part and I hope in the next film it's all abut him. And I basically legit cried during that final battle because Blue came back and they worked together and then the mosasaurus finally got a decent meal and everyone was then, like, on their own and it was, like, sad, you know.

Person of Interest is back and it's absolutely tragic. Reese called Finch Harold. I am entirely undone by his love for him. I cry.

CheyenneCollapse )
27 April 2016 @ 03:19 pm
I found a post I wrote about Bat Masterson when I fist saw the show back in 2008:

It's about this guy, who was like an actual guy in the 1800's, who goes around in a Derby hat and a cane and saves the day... while also being kinda skeezy. Like he's a gambler and will totally take someone's money. And, for some reason, during most of the eps I've seen, has his shirt off in a bedroom with another guy. A bunch of scenes start off with Bat buttoning up his shirt and the other guy sitting on the bed. It amuses me.
But the real Bat Masterson wasn't that great of... anything. But he told people he was. Awesome. And then he became a writer for a newspaper and died at his typewriter after finishing his last article.

And in another post:
But how does he keep his pants pressed so nice?

All still entirely true thoughts and feelings. I mean, I guess maybe he'd send his pants out to be pressed. I can see that in a fairly big town, but out on the trail? Does he iron them himself? Could be possible.
25 April 2016 @ 02:17 am
Ugh. I'm in deep Bat Masterson / Cheyenne hell.

I thought about Cheyenne saying "Mr Masterson" in his redic deep voice. And I thought about Bat being sweet and gentle to Cheyenne, but also firm, because Bat's older and more respectable. (and Cheyenne respecting that)
Like maybe Bat's running a gambling hall that doubles as a brothel. And maybe Cheyenne has no money, and has been roughed up by some cruel range hands, and needs a place to stay and a good meal. And he doesn't really notice what's going on at Bat's place, not at first, he's just grateful that someone's being kind to him. Maybe Bat gives him a job up front, dealing cards or serving drinks, and Cheyenne doesn't understand why all the men give him such appreciative looks. Maybe Bat sees a lot of potential in this tall young man and takes him under his wing. Maybe Cheyenne can't look Bat in the eyes when Bat explains to him why he's so appreciated. Maybe Bat lifts Cheyenne's chin up with his cane, forcing him to meet his gaze. Bat probably lays out a reasonable proposition to Cheyenne, if he'd like to stay in town, explaining how valuable of an asset to Bat's business he'd be, and then telling him how refreshing Cheyenne's wild spirit is, how untameable he is, and how he doesn't want to break that, doesn't want to turn Cheyenne into some docile creature, but that he still intends to treat Cheyenne with a firm hand, so that Cheyenne always knows who's in charge (as though Cheyenne didn't already). And Cheyenne is probably a little shy about this kind of business, because it's usually more of a woman's profession, but Bat maybe uses that firm hand to rid him of such foolish notions.

This is terrible. I'm gonna die.